How to Start Changing Your Relationship with Animals

It can feel so overwhelming to think about reducing the exploitation of animals in your life, because it is part of the fabric of our society. From what we eat, to what we wear, to how we relax, animals are embedded everywhere.

But taking small, achievable steps can help you develop new habits in a sustainable way. One meal is a great place to start.

Read on for more ideas and resources.

We all start somewhere (even cows!)

So you want to try to reduce your reliance on animal products, but aren’t sure where to begin.

I’ve been there.

Five years ago, I ate meat and didn’t think too much about any of these issues. I totally fell for the “Welfare Trap.” The truth was, I couldn’t fathom becoming vegan. How would I get enough protein? What would I eat when I went home for the holidays? What would my friends and family say? It seemed so extreme. Would I even like vegan food?

There is no one right way to start. But I’ll tell you what worked for me.

First came the intention.

I wanted to change my relationship with animals. I felt a lot of dissonance between what I knew in my thinking brain (i.e., that animals and humans suffer in our food system, which I disagreed with) and what I chose in my daily actions (eating meat anyways). I wanted to make a change.

This came about by reading, thinking, and learning. Doing the work. We have been brainwashed our entire lives into thinking that animal agriculture is natural, necessary, and sustainable. But it’s not.

As I learned more and more, my dissonance grew stronger. Starting with solidifying my intention—educating myself and thinking through my values—laid a strong foundation for the work of changing my behaviors.

Because, really, once I learned about our food system, I knew something had to change.

So next, I took some small, sustainable steps.

Some people go vegan overnight, and that’s great. I was not one of those people.

I knew it would be too hard to cut everything out at once. So I started with my personal low-hanging fruit. For me, ham and pork products had never been that important, and I knew how smart pigs are, and how uniquely incompatible they are with modern factory farming. So I “cut out” pig products, even though that asked almost nothing of me.

But starting with something easy helped me strengthen the muscle, and develop my ideas and goals.

Next came beef, then chicken. Last to go was fish.

Then a few months later, I finally stopped buying dairy and eggs at the store, and I started cooking vegan at home.

And only after that did I stop buying products out and about that contained animal products.

For me, building confidence and making sure my changes were sustainable was critical to my vegan journey. If I cut everything out at once, I’m sure I would have found it really hard. Reducing over time helped me transition.

(Do I wish I went fully vegan sooner? Absolutely…)

Last—and much later—I owned the “vegan” identity.

“Vegan” is such a buzz word, and so many people have strong feelings about it. It took me almost a year of being vegan before I actually called myself vegan. I didn’t want to be contrarian, to make a fuss, to demand other people explain their dietary choices or make them feel bad. I just wanted to quietly eat what I wanted to eat.

But when I finally named it, it felt right and true. I care about reducing animal—and human—suffering. Being vegan is part of how I try to do that.

Ultimately, what you call yourself is up to you. What matters is that you feel good about the choices you make with your day.

Now, I celebrate being vegan.

Thinking of veganism as a set of cutbacks, restrictions, and sacrifices may be how I started, but it’s not where I am today.

Being vegan is joyful. It means fueling my body with nourishing plants, a huge variety of food, and experimenting with flavors. It means not being trapped by what the animal agriculture industry has told us we need to eat, and instead listening to my own values to feed my body and soul.

And being vegan has brought me so much—community, meaning, new hobbies, a sense of peace, and more.

So: How can you start on this journey?

Here’s a few ideas:

• Get educated. Read about our food system, and decide how you feel about your role in it. Learn what really happens during slaughter and understand the scope of factory farming. Check out books like Eating Animals by Jonathan Safran Foer or Wastelands by Corban Addison. Follow my blog, and others like it, for more ideas and insights to get you going.

• Try setting a small goal for yourself. Cut out a type of animal product, or commit to eating vegetarian one day a week (or even just one meal a week). See how it feels. What are your sticking points?

• Keep trying new places and new food. Search for the best vegan/vegetarian-friendly restaurants in your area. There are so many blogs out there highlighting these delicious places!

• Try to find a couple staple vegan recipes you really like to cook. I like to call these “gateway meals,” or meals where almost nothing is lost by cooking them vegan. These might include:

  • Tacos (use crumbled tempeh or tofu for the “meat,” or just keep it simple with black beans, roasted sweet potato and cauliflower, rice, guacamole, hot sauce, and cilantro).

  • Soups (chili, white bean soup, or minestrone are super easy options to vegan-ize).

  • Pasta (try a store-bought protein pasta, like Banza, roast some vegetables, and put together a quick vegan pesto or vodka sauce).

• Get inspired. Follow blogs, accounts, and influencers who can inspire you and help you find a community of like-minded people!

• Don’t get discouraged, and just do your best. I believe so strongly that perfection is the enemy of the good when it comes to veganism. If you’re traveling and hungry and tired and just need a meal, it’s okay to eat something you normally wouldn’t. If there’s just one thing you can’t imagine giving up, try giving up everything except for that one thing. Reduction is important. Market power can take time to build.

• Bring your people along! Share your journey, talk to your friends and family, and lead conversations about what you’re learning and trying. It’s okay to ask for help, too!

Being vegan has changed my life for the better.

I think it might do the same for you, too.